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Sunday, January 25, 2015

PROUD | parenting .....

Life affords no greater responsibility, no greater privilege
than the raising of the next generation.

Charles Everet Koop

I suspect I am not the only one who has found herself explaining 'parenting' to her children.
Sharing Admitting Confessing that we are not so very different in that there is no exact science to performing our roles.  They are confused, leery, and not always sure in their choices as young adults;
struggling between being 'the child' versus being 'responsible/independent/mature'.
And I'm not exactly a pro at this thing called "parenting".
Torn between doing everything in my power to make them happy 
to being the warden giving them boundaries and limitations; saying "no".
There have been points in this conversation where I had to remind them that just as it is their first time doing/experiencing/learning, this too is my first time as "the" parent. 
What's more, I'm not always going to get it right.
What ultimately matters is doing what you believe is right, not necessarily what is popular.  
What ultimately matters is admitting that sometimes what is popular doesn't mean it's wrong.
It's hard.  Hard like a true/false test with no right answer.
And it doesn't help that stubbornness has no age restriction. (curses!)

Choices / Decisions

We fret over them every day and wake up at 3 am each night to fret over them some more.
I firmly believe that if you are making an effort to be a good parent and not a BFF,
this is a sign you are doing it right.

I am so proud to be a mom.

I am proud to say I have grown in the process.
I am proud to report that I now know:
1) you will never experience greater pain and jubilation in the same breath as when you give birth;
2) it is possible to witness (and clean up) vomit without vomiting yourself;
3) the empty nest syndrome is not nearly as bad as it sounds 
because no matter how far they move away 
they are forever immediate in your thoughts, in your heart, and in your cell phone.


It's not only children who grow, parents do too.
As much as we watch to see what our children do with their lives,
they are watching us to see what we do with ours.
I can't tell my children to reach for the sun.
All I can do is reach for it myself.
Joyce Maynard

** Allyson made it safely to her destination yesterday. She forever is a lesson in just about every measure of life to me; at times frustrating me to the inth degree , at times making me so proud I could bust. Exhausted as she had to be after 14 hours of travel, culminating with the conclusion that hauling/pushing/dragging/shoving a 46 pound suitcase down a snowy street should be a Biggest Loser challenge - she still found it in herself to aid some younger students in getting to their destination.  
Proud personified.


  1. You are clearly a great mom!!
    So glad Allyson made it back up here - just in time for the blizzard - does she have provisions?

    1. Thank you! Allyson is good to go, went out today and made sure she was stocked on necessaries - otherwise I believe the cook staff remains on campus so the cafeterias run nearly as usual and she can get to one without having to venture outside.

  2. Boy, you've hit the nail on the head with this post. Being a parent is very complicated, if nothing else. Well, I'm glad that Allison made it back to the frozen north safely. I hear we are in for one heck of a storm starting tomorrow night. Here's to us all staying safe!

  3. I have always said being a parent is the hardest and most rewarding job I have ever had and I wouldn't trade it for anything....So glad she got to her destination safe and sound....

  4. Nicky: I'm reading your words and sighing with every other breath. You are absolutely correct. We never tried being our kids' BFF, and yet, because we allowed them the space to grow, we find that they are seeking us out because they seem to like us! It is very true that these young adults are now watching us to see what we do with the rest of our lives. Damn! The work isn't over yet.

  5. Awesome post and you sum it all up very well. The greatest thing in the world is being a parent.